A letter to Santa

Champagne coupes - I have lots of flutes but really like the idea of the glamour associated with a coupe

My Christmas wish list includes:

• Fragments by Marilyn Monroe





• Slinky silk jersey leopard Wildeve dress from LK Bennett








• The Vert body lotion by Bulgari - I fell in love with this fragrance when it was the house toiletries in the Hilton Maldives Rangali, and now whenever I wear it I am transported back there - well I wish I was

• Black knee high riding boots
  





• A cream vintage cake tin
  

I am going to add to this as I go along - not expecting Santa to bring them all but it might help me in the post Christmas sales.

How to wear chunky?

Christian Dior Autumn Winter 2010/11 - I love the hand knitted jumper on the left, I saw it in Vogue and thought I can achieve that look - I can buy a High Street chunky knit and some ribbon and customise away - the flaw in the plan is that all the chunky stuff on the High Street (Zara have a long line Aran type cardigan with a belt) makes me look shall we say "matronly" - in a Hattie Jacques sort of a way (I am only a UK size 12 so this should not happen). The last time this look was "in" I borrowed the lovely man's home knitted Starsky and Hutch cardi (it was pre marriage, some time in the mid '70s) and even as a skinny size 10 the resulting sumo look was not good. Best leave the look to the man who did it best!

Pumpkins

No time for a long chat, got to get out in this glorious Autumn weather - just thought you might like the photo of the guests at a "bring your own pumpkin" party my daughter went to x

Andrew Marr's Quote

"A lot of bloggers seem to be socially inadequate, pimpled, single, slightly seedy, bald, cauliflower-nosed young men sitting in their mother's basements and ranting" - discuss.

Well bloody hell none of my bloggers are I am sure. Although we haven't met, in my head you are well educated, glamorous (or well turned out), with hair where you should have (or if not see my post coming soon on the Boots Smoothskin), living fantastic busy lives which make me wonder how any of you have the time to blog. You all have excellent social skills, are brilliant parents (where applicable - see Hestia's Larder, Wilderness Chic and Mrs Jones) great pet owners (where applicable - see Mrs Jones, Wilderness Chic and Hestia) amazing artists (see The Mermaid Gallery) and have fabulous wardrobes (see Mrs Jones, Christina at Fashion's Most Wanted and Wilderness Chic) and beautiful homes (see Splenderosa). Oh and obviously you are all hugely talented (anyone I have not mentioned) on the interweb!

And anyway, do any of you have mother's with basements? Mine has a cellar - does that count? - although I don't think wireless would work down there!

The Eyes Have It

I mentioned some time ago when I was tagged, that I love permanent eyelash extensions but was concerned about having them with my newly acquired contact lenses. Well the story progresses, I had a break from the extensions and found that underneath them, my own lashes seemed to have grown thicker and longer - wasn't what I was expecting at all. When I have extensions, I only use eye liner (Buried Treasure Powerpoint by Mac - fantastic go with everything colour), but now that I am extension free, I use Lancome - a sort of white undercoat called Cils Booster, followed by their vibrating mascara in black, and I like the results. However I was out with a friend recently and thought she was wearing falsies, but actually she had been using Rapidlash serum, and it does really work - I am a week into using it and am convinced - if mine look like hers do after a month, then the extensions will be no more.

So onto the subject of contact lenses - I had 20/20 vision until about 4 years ago, when I suddenly needed bright light to see restaurant menus - I had a moment's revelation in Scott's when I asked for a torch to look at the menu, and a pair of reading glasses were proffered! Or had to hold things further away from me to focus. I reluctantly had an eye test, and sure enough I needed reading glasses, now I realise this sounds naive, but I did not know you could easily buy these things off the shelf, and the optician was in no hurry to tell me this either, I struggled to find anything I thought suited me and didn't make me look like an old lady, and in the end settled for a pair of nude coloured MaxMara frames - a cool £300. No sooner did I have these things, than I noticed I was holding stuff away again to see it clearly, I never had them with me when I needed them anyway (in a hotel shower, how can you tell the shampoo from the conditioner from the shower gel - you can't without being able to read the label - in fact on a recent Italian trip, my hair was exceptionally soft because I used sodding body lotion instead of conditioner - actually it did really improve my hair and totally banished any frizz). So as fast as you buy reading glasses you need another pair - you need them in every room in the house unless you are going to wear them on a chain around your neck (no I am not) or on top of your head (yes sometimes) or worst of all keep them on all the time and peer over the top of the frames (never). I bought cheap glasses after I left my Maxmaras in the seat pocket in front of me on a flight to Malta and they were never handed in.

Re the looking like an old person thing, behaving like one is worse - not being able to see when you have missed a bit of food on crockery you hand wash, or that there are cobwebs everywhere, or that your make-up is smudged, or the bathroom tiles need cleaning- all things your eagle eyed offspring will cheerily point out, and that will horrify you when you can see. So I needed to get my eyes sorted.

Things got worse or so I thought when I visited a large American wholesale outlet for an eye test because the TV screen was now a little blurry and some road signs were too small at a distance, and was told I needed to wear glasses all the time -" I don't think so " I said confidently, "I will have my eyes lasered or I will wear contact lenses!" The optician was happy for me to book in for a trial of contact lenses, and this was when everything became clear - another female optician helped me, she was a contact wearer herself, she boosted my confidence about managing them and told me that to cope without them for distance I could buy a pair of off the shelf +1.50 glasses, and to improve my reading with lenses in, I could use the same +1.50s - it works a treat. As I left her room my phoned buzzed, I was meeting my son outside, I went to find my glasses and realised I could see who was calling me - amazing, I met him and we wandered around the store, I was thrilled to bits with my new eyes until we saw a row of flat screen tellies and all were completely blurred, thankfully my technowiz son could point out that they were 3D TVs and I needed special glasses to see the picture LOL.

The lovely lady optician had left her job the day after my consultation with her, which explains her lack of another agenda re selling me more glasses, and her supportive attitude if I wanted to have my eyes lasered. When when I went for follow up, the new optician tried to convince me that I needed to buy glasses for lens free days, I agreed to consider his advice but I am actually managing fine with True Eye lenses every day, I wouldn't rule out laser treatment but they seem to be coming up with better methods of doing this all the time. Anyone got any comments or advice it would be much appreciated x

I spent last night clutching a bottle of chilled white wine - now retitled An Aga Saga, by Joanne a trollop

But not for the usual reasons - stressful day at work? No, dealing with small children? No, row with the lovely man? No, plumbers/carpenters/electricians? No..............................I picked up a pan which I had just taken out of the oven...................words cannot describe - well they can, but not here. I was multi-tasking which is normal for most of us, and I committed the range owner cardinal sin - save money and reduce cooking aromas by using the oven rather than the hob, lift pan out of oven using oven gloves, move pan on hob with bare hands. I wouldn't care but I always warn anyone who comes near the kitchen about this, I always put on a handle cover, but on this occasion I didn't. I rushed to the sink and ran the cold tap, which always runs warm for the first few gallons because of proximity to hot water pipes. I warmed the burn a little then ran back to the hob where the garlic I had been lightly toasting in the oven was now burning - this time I did use the handle cover.

So when I eventually sat down to eat, it was with my left hand, whilst my right one was chilling on the wine (obviously had a glass at this point to soothe and calm). I Googled the doctor and found that you should never put anything ice cold on a burn, you should cool it and then cover it with cling film or a bag, so I spent the rest of the evening languishing on the sofa, feeling sorry for myself with my hand in a ziploc bag - very glamorous, but it did work, and I only have a tiny blister on my ring finger to show for all the pain (wouldn't be typing this otherwise).

Your money or your life?

It's been an unusual news week and poses a question for me - who would you prefer to be, or rather who is luckiest, the winner of the euromillions £113 million, or a Chilean miner ? - all 33 released last night after 69 days underground. Time really is the one thing that money cannot buy. I have found it difficult to follow the updates about the miners, this because just the thought of the darkness and confined space is enough to create panic and claustrophobia in me, it is my big fear. However I have no trouble daydreaming about what I might do with £113 million pounds (it's never going to happen because I don't do the lottery!) So this morning when I heard the news that the last miner had been safely brought up in the capsule I imagined the joy that he and his family must be feeling, and really winning the lottery couldn't compare could it?